“By approaching my problems with "What might make things a little
better?" rather than "What is the solution?" I avoid setting myself up
for certain frustration. My experience has shown me that I am not going
to solve anything in one stroke; at best I am only going to chip away at
it.”
―
Hugh Prather,
I Touch the Earth, the Earth Touches Me
I have to say this is something that applies with problem solving. Everyone always looks for a solution. How do I solve this? How do I make this end? How do I quit people from doing this to others? It is always the word how that brings about the thought what is the solution. To some problems there are no solutions because we are not in control of how others act.
Other people can be rude, inconsiderate, insecure, liars and thieves. They can also be nice, sweet, kind, helpful and loving. The ones that have to be mean bring us into a certain place of how to stop them. People try to ignore others business just to give them respect. Yet these people have patterns of behavior and we can not solve that behavior of the ones that have to be inconsiderate, liars, and other bad actions.
The other people are blessings that we remember through out our entire life. I had a young girl who knew I felt ill try to get me to laugh. I opened the window and she was hanging from a pole attached to the walkway above my apartment. She was making a silly face and clinging to the window bars. My first thought was "Oh no she will hurt herself and I yelled at her. Don't fall I do not have anything to help you if you get hurt."
She looked so upset and hurt that I could not take it. I said "I'm sorry-I like you and I do not know what I would do if you got hurt. I don't have any bandages or any way to help you." She smiled with a happy grin and said "You like me." I told her that I liked all of the children that played in the yard in front of my place and on the water tower. I just worried about them falling. She listed off everyone's name including the daughter of my friend and said can I tell them that you like them. I had to laugh and said yes because it is true. She had so much fun going around telling everyone that I liked them.
I really felt good when I heard her parents say "Have we ever told our children that we like them?" The husband said I don't think so we always assumed that they knew we liked and loved them. They then told their three daughters that they liked them. The children looked so happy and all of the parents got into the moment.
So the nice sweet kind moments are more valuable than all of the moments that are dealing with the people who act otherwise. Maybe the bad acting people suffered from problems to warp them into weird ways of thoughts and hatefulness to others. Yet all of us have a choice to make things a little better. Sometimes it is standing up for ourselves no matter what others try to make of it. Sometimes it is realizing that people can be mentally ill and to have compassion for them and ignore their bad behavior as much as possible. Yet the line that can not be crossed is when they hurt others or do something really bad.
Other times it is making a memory of a really nice moment and knowing that I had a whole neighborhood tell their children that they loved and liked them. It is something anyone can do and any person that objects is the problem. Everyone remembers those moments in their lives where they felt liked and loved so making a memory of that for children is very important. Everyone needs that moment old or young.
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